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Wednesday, June 17, 2009

Yeah...late post, but whatever. It's here, right? Read it.

As someone might notice, I'm a couple days late with the update, but well, life happens. I hung out with some friends Monday night, and last night.. I don't remember what distracted me last night. Anyway, it's here now, so, wee. Oh yeah, I moved the guestbook to the top because some people are too lazy to scroll (It's cool. I am too.)

Egg update: It's still there... >>

Okay, so first up this week was an oddity I came across in the grocery store, once again. Beef Feet. ..... yeah, that's what I said. Beef...feet, the feet of beef, e.g. cows e.g. FEET? So, yeah, I get that such things are used to make soup stock or broth stock. Just like the first time I saw chicken feet in a store, all packaged to be sold. I get that people do it, but it still weirds me out. Being of latino descent and growing up in areas with large latino populations, I got used to seeing like, cow brains, cow tongue... but I'd never seen feet, especially not packaged so...well...bluntly. It's like the beer that comes in a can with a brown label and just says BEER on the label. I guess I find it a little gross too because I don't even eat red meat. So yeah... I was definately all like WTF?! o_O There we go.


Next up for discussion is something I found while in the Salvation Army. I was looking for a desk chair, and when the only one I found was badly overpriced (at the thrift store...go figure), I decided to browse the brick-a-brack shelves. So I'm just looking around, and I come across these: Drizzle Boots. They're like, a portable rain boot you can keep in your car, your purse, your trunk, etcetc. Obviously the packaged was kind of aged, and I'm not sure if the 'Drizzle Boots' had already been used. Immediately I was reminded of the little plastic rain ponchos and rain bonnets my grandmother had in her purse. It's start to sprinkle and she's whip out this thing the size of a handi-wipe and have plastic headgear on 10 seconds later. Amazing. Anyway, So yeah, these just made me chuckle. Drizzle Boots...hehheh. What a terrible product name.



Last on the agenda today is a another reader submission, from my pal B. This one especially made me laugh because it's supposed to be something helpful and useful to someone that's trying to understand their religious faith... however, if you notice, it's The Complete Idiot's Guide to Christian Prayer and Devotion. Heh...Yeahhhh. It's like they already did themselves in, so any critics of this kind of book, well...their peace has already been said. It's like a silent win. I mean, okay... I have no issues with people having their own beliefs and believing in them devoutly. Kudos to you if you found something that works for you. But I'd think that even some Christians would shake their heads at this because well... It's kind of defamatory. But... really, in short, it's f*ckin' hilarious. Seriously... too perfect.

And, thus brings an end to another glorious time. Well, I don't know if it was glorious, but I was amused while writing it. But yeah, if you're so inclined, sign the guestbook. Anyway, I'm gonna go do some stuff now. What stuff? That, I can't tell you because... I'm a ninja, and ninjas have secrets. w3rd.


Monday, June 8, 2009

More WTF, from me to you. Aw <3 Now read, dammit.

So, here I am again with yet more material. But before we get on to the fun, a few notes. First off, you might've noticed a few new things about the blog (or maybe you didn't notice at all, but will now because I'm pointing them out). I've added:

  • A guestbook - Now you can leave comments about the blog and/or things relative to WTF sort of content. Yay for sharing. (Note: If you have a personal message for me, email me or catch me on messenger). Located at the Bottom of the page.
  • A links list- If you have your own blog, website, or whatever and would like to link, drop me a line and let me know.
  • Subscribe/Follow features- If you have a Google Mail or Blogger account, you can follow and/or subscribe to blog posts.
  • Reader Submissions- A few people who read the blog have already sent me photos to use in upcomming blog entries. I've decided to include one reader submission per blog entry (so long as I have one to use). If you have one that you'd like to submit, hit me up by email.
Oh, and an update on the egg: It's still in the front yard, it still hasn't hatched, and it's definitely not rotting. So... is there something in there? Could be. I guess we'll find out soon... >> Now on to the fun.

Okay, so my first example of the day come from a trip the grocery store awhile back. I was browsing the discount/discontinued items shelf and came across something that turned my stomach a little. Snails in a can. Hmm... you know, I know that snails are a kind of a food delacacy and they're definately an acquired taste. However, I highly doubt that when people do choose to eat snails that they come out of aged tin can found on the discount shelf of their local grocery store. Call me silly, but that just sounds...disgusting. I mean, canned versions of products usually are the lowest level quality example of said food that you can find, but in this case, I think that's an understatement. I'd have to say this ranks about par with the fancy varieties of cat food.

Next on the ticket is a book I came across while walking in downtown Chico during my lunch break during a class day. I always tend to look in the windows of the huge used bookstore to see what they might have in stock and on special. When I came across this book, I was half taken aback, and half doubled over in laughter. Happy to be Nappy? o_O... Really? I mean, hey, nothing wrong with being proud of your culture and the distinctively ethnic, biological charatersitics that with it. I'm all about being proud of who you are and where you come from... but... it just seemed a little weird to see a book that was promoting cutural and self-pride using a traditionally derogatory descriptive term in it's title. Maybe I'm looking at it from a 'PC' stance, but really, wow. Seriously? Wow. I mean, I'm down with the fact that I'm mixed raced, and take pride in both halves of my heritage. But I'm not going to go and write a book with a title like 'Happy to be a Wetback Cracker'. Dude, seriously.

And the final feature of the day is the first in a series of Reader Submissions, (Picture provided by Sarah B.) . This little gem comes from a shopping trip that I was on with two of my friends. One of my friends opted to have Panda Express while we were in the food court, and my best friend found it perfectly opportune to snap a photo of our other friend's cup. Now, the message is supposed to imply that the Panda loves Orange Chicken, however, the photo also gives way to another, less wholesome inuendo. To quote my best friend "The Panda loves the cock!" Heh. And given the Panda's expression, he seems 'hungry' for more than a bowl of orange chicken. I'm not sure if the advertising and design departments for Panda Express really counted on people making this associtation, but you know there had to at least be one person that snickered when they saw the picture and thought 'The Panda loves cock!' With his tounge hanging out, his expression is fully conncentrated on the longing thoughts of his 'orange chicken' (which is code for cock- and I don't mean a male chicken).

Monday, June 1, 2009

What's the point? There isn't one. That is it. Yeah, take that.

Okay, so being that I don't have a full time job right now, and I'm out of school.. I decided I needed something to do with my time when I'm not working on music, writing ,or art. I wanted something simple that would both fill my time and amuse me. That...and I have a lot of funny or 'wtf' cell phone pictures that I feel the need to share with the public. Why? Dude, I don't know. I'm going to elect the catch-all answer of : Cuz I feel like it. Some people will likely (and ironically) 'wtf?' in response, others will be amused (like myself), and others just won't give a shit. To all those people, whatever the reaction, you still read my shit, so woo-farkin-hoo. Or...something? Hell, I don't know. Anyway, on to the fun. Yeah.

So... anyone that knows me, knows that I have a lot of random, wtf moments that occur in my life. It's funny to use 'wtf' as a descriptor, but really, it just works sometimes. I've been in the habit of taking pictures of the random things that make me do a doubletake. This brings us here.

So one day on the way to school, we decide to stop off in a drive-thru for something to drink. Mc Donald's was the closest to the highway, so I was like, okay ,this works. I pull into the drive-thru, and I noticed a pile of rubble where the menu used to be (I've been to this location previously, so I knew it had been there at one time). Pull up a little further... and I see this.. The menu speaker, on a pole, with cardboard around it. You can't really make it out in the picture, but the words "ORDER HERE" are written in (with a Bic type pen) blue. Seriously... that was totally Double-Ewe-Tee-Eff. I mean okay... so someone probably got into an accident and rammed the menu board, leaving it in the pile of rubble I saw when I pulled in. But c'mon...they couldn't even use a Sharpie? And maybe at least a decent piece of cardboard? Standards people! Jesus. Heh, really... I was kinda glad to see that because I looked forward to sending it to my best friend, Sarah. We have a habit of trading WTF pictures, as both of us have frequent WTF moments. Anyway, moving on...

A couple of weeks ago, I was walking through a grocery store, and took a stroll down the alcohol isle. My mom and I were buying spirits for my brother's graduation party and trying to decide what to get. I was scanning over the lower level vodka options and came across the brand "Sobieski" (which made me think of Leelee Sobieski), and saw this on the label. Now, for those of you that aren't familiar with alcohol quality levels and its relation to the distilling process, the more you distill it, the higher the purification of the alcohol. So yeah... the more distillation, the better the vodka. But this brand has the logo "Distilled Enough!" ... I didn't know how to take that, really. I mean its like they accept that their vodka may not be the best quality, but they're okay with that. It doesn't have to be. It's distilled...enough. It's like.. the common joe vodka. It says, "Hey, I'm not perfect, but I'm enough. I might not be the BEST vodka, but hey, I'm cool with that. And you should be to. So... drink me and have a moderately enjoyable experience. " Dude... not to pull out the blog name again but, WTF? Did they seriously think this was a good marketing ploy? Offering a mediocre product and not even pretending its any good? I have to say, the companies lack of confidence in their product disappoints me, even if it does suck. And why would I want to spend $10.99 on a bottle of crappy liquor that already has told me that it doesn't taste good? Maybe some people might be curious, but I'll tell you what, curiosity sometimes bring heartburn and upset stomachs. (And yeah, I know that from experience, because I tried it once. But in my defense, it didn't have that slogan on it at the time.)

For my third installment of this introductory entry, I'm bringing a things a bit closer to home. The other day, I was doing something in the kitchen, and I hear my mother comming up the walk. Then I hear her talking to my brother, and I hear them say something about an egg. I was like o_O huh? And egg? Outside? So.. curious, I went out to see what they were talking about. My mom asks me if I've seen the egg on the lawn. And I'm like.. "What egg?" -blinkblink- And I look, and not far from the toe of her shoe, is an egg. We've speculated that it's a chicken egg, but... there are no chickens in our area of town. In fact, it's not even legal to own a chicken in this area because of city zoning laws. I'm not sure what else it could be from, but I'm not sure I want to know. But, of course, I snapped a picture and sent it away via text message to a few people. I'm still baffled as to how it got there and how it's gone undamaged. We left it sitting there, purely out of curiosity to see what might happen to it. My mother suggested that it was a giant frog, seeing as we've had a recent infestation of little tiny frogs all over our yard (I'm talking hundreds of them. It's kind of gross. You have to be careful where you step of ~SQUISH!~ Yeah. Ew.) Anyway, I don't know what it is, and I have no idea where it came from, but we'll see what happens. Either it'll rot and we'll have some stank for a few days, or something is going to hatch from it. I'm guessing the former rather than the later, but -shrug- we'll see. Still... wtf? Random eggs in my yard, hundreds of frogs... yeah.

Hm... I guess that's all for now, really. Rest assured, there will be plenty of other entries with lots of other material. Just when I think my life is sedate and dull, something weird happens. I could spend hours telling someone about weird shit that's happend in my life. However, instead, I'm going to share those in blog posts. If someone's reading and especially of they're amused, thanks for stopping by.

I'm gonna go check on the egg.... >_>
 
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